Are You Strong Enough To Ask For Help?

Employee engagement, management engagement, leadership, passion in the workplace. . .

These rallying cries fill books, blogs, and backroom banter. The real issue: "How can we get done what needs to get done and create a sense of "we're in this together" at the same time?

It's actually quite simple:

To Get Something Done, Ask for Help

There is nothing that sparks the human spirit--and thus adds meaning to a task--than the satisfaction of providing help to someone who needs it.

Yet my experience--at least in many western cultures--is that it is somehow viewed as  "weak" to ask for help. After all, if I'm a guy who gets things done, I don't want people to think that I can't get things done.

I know you already see the fallacy in this. Most textbook definitions of management include some version of: "Management--getting things done through others."

Hmm. As a manager that means, by definition, I need your help.

What Actually Happens Vs. The Simplicity of Help

See if this isn't a little closer to the norm:

Manager: "Andrew, our sales goals are up by 8%. You supervise the customer service reps. You need to be able to support that. Make it happen."

Now, that 's not too bad a directive at all in the grand scheme of things. (For those who only respond to warm and fuzzy, it's probably not). It's fairly specific, understandable, and has an action attached. However, we've got an entire generation of management research that everyone has been exposed to through workshops and reading. The essence of that research is that people want to be respected,involved in solutions, and have a sense of meaning in what they do.

So, I suggest:

Manager: Andrew, our sales goals are up by 8%. I need help. (Shut up).

Note to managers: Really, you do need help. You're getting paid to make the 8% happen--through other people.

Andrew: How can I help?

Honestly, if the manager & Andrew have a decent relationship, "helping" is about as meaningful as life can get at that moment.

Manager: You supervise the customer service reps. We need to be able to support that 8% bump. How would you go about doing that with your people?

• Statement one: Places next level of responsibility where it belongs.

• Statement two: Specifies the  issue.

• Statement  three:  Involvement and  more meaning. (In the event that Andrew struggles a bit, this is the "teachable moment" for coaching).

What will you do?

What someone does for a living is part of the working agreement. How they do it is why they--as individuals--were (hopefully) hired in the first place. When you allow someone to exercise the personalhow, you have created the intersection of individual meaning and engagement .

Are you strong enough to ask for help today?

Earn Your "Change Chips" Early

If you want to change an organization, you start by changing the patterns in which people talk together, the things they talk about, the frequency of their contact and the makeup of those who overhear them." --Art Kleiner, Who Really Matters

I would add: Start doing those things before you need acceptance for a new initiative.

Change Chips Are Earned Up Front

Most change models start at the point where someone shares a new vision or plan, then asks for enthusiastic support. But we're all poker players (whether we know it or not). We spend time unconsciously earning or collecting chips based on the frequency and quality of our interactions. When it comes time to ask for something, that stack of chips can mean a make-it-or-break-it hand. It looks like this:

So What Does This Mean?

If we're in a position to initiate something new or different, the time we've invested  building solid relationships can determine our ability to gain support and moment.  The leader who spends time playing corporate video poker may revel in his individual genius--but lacks the relational chips needed to convert that genius into action.

What are you doing today to build the stack necessary for a successful change?

Are you "starting change before it starts?"

Business or Busyness?

Recently I met with a corporate Executive VP in New York City. I'll call him Phil. Phil said his division was struggling. But instead of leading the charge to turn things around, he was being called into meetings regularly to make lengthy, detailed, Powerpoint presentations explaining what was wrong. He was too busy doing business to be doing the business. Interestingly, one of his recommendations was for the company to get out of some of its operations because they were draining money and other resources. He explained that his people were spending too much time on things that no longer yielded the kind of margins the company desired.

Does any of this sound remotely familiar to you? I realized while he was talking to me that I had gotten up at 5 a.m. to deal with emails from a European client; spent time on the cell phone in transit with a non-profit, pro bono client who needed to talk; and allowed myself to be sidetracked by hallway conversations with managers from the client group who I hadn't seen in a while. A similar schedule unraveled today.

What is there to learn?

1. If you do business globally in the electronic age, the expectation is that you are available on "their" time...or you should be. So choose carefully--you can't afford to be awake 24 hours a day.

2. Time management isn't really just about time. It's about clear priorities. Which means...

3. It's important to say "no." In fact, I think "no" is the solution to a lot of this craziness.

4. If you are in Phil's position, at some point you need to tell those above you that the very act of "over-reporting" is exacerbating the problem. Do it respectfully. Share the impact and consequences on your business and let them take responsibility for whether or not it makes sense to continue the external demands on your time.

How are you handling this in your life?

Still Doing More With Less?

Hope you can join us on the Ken Blanchard Livecast:

Coaching Builds Commitment

Did you know that the majority of employees today expect their managers to coach them? At the same time, managers are concerned that they won't have all the answers.

That's understandable, given the human condition's need for a sense of control and, in a manager's case, the appearance of expertise.

The good news: Employees don't want advice. They want to be stretched and asked questions that allow them to sort things out and learn as a result.

Here's What It Takes

A productive manager-employee coaching relationship includes these elements:

• Self-Direction. The employee initiates areas for learning and relies on the manager for support when necessary.
  
  
• Self-Responsibility. The coaching manager encourages employees to make decisions through reflective questions.
  
  
• Focus on Learning. Employee develops new skills with the support of the coaching manager, then sets new goals and standards.

Three To-Dos for Managers Who Coach

1. Set clear expectations for results and let your people find their own best way to get the job done. (You hired them for their unique attributes).

2. Give people as much responsibility as they can handle, then support them. People grow from being stretched.

3. Develop the habit of asking "How can we. . .?" instead of "Why did you. . ?"  Think about the distinction.